This is by far the worst part of it all...
Worse than the testing, the needle sticks, the funky reaction to meds, the watching the tests and not having a warm fuzzy about it all.
2ww - The two week wait. What's more is the 2ww2ww... (or, in other words, four weeks).
I want to feel something, anything which tells me this all worked. But the meds create a false sense of "positive"... when I feel anything at all. You read all sorts of things including the concept of "well I just KNEW I was pregnant" and, feeling nothing, think "well... then I must not be." It's hard. Every twinge could be hope... or hope dashed. Each day I wake up with dread that it's going to be the day that things prove it didn't work... again.
And yet... LOGICALLY (because we all know how well I do that), I do know that I could have no symptoms at all. I might not even "feel" anything until WELL into the first trimester.
And so.... I have to wait. I have to wait until there is some actual evidence. A line on a stick; a blood test saying positive... the first sounds of a heartbeat.
And I can't bear it and everyone says to relax and not stress and stay positive.
IT'S SO VERY HARD.
But... wait I must. For good or ill. And just try to keep positive and hope and endure 2ww.
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